Category: Mental Health

Peace and Freedom

Posted on by Gregory Wood

Due to my Aspergers and anxiety issues I tend to hyper focus on my problems, conflicts with people, etc. I learned this as a result of having to overcome so many problems in obtaining my education. Hyper focus was my strength.  Hyper focus was a plus in the school environment but not so good with my people skills and the work environment of sales, customer service positions that require flexibility in thinking and tasks.  In my volunteer capacity at the Red Cross there is no structure in the job tasks I perform.  I have been in a disaster operation with the organization, which causes a great deal of stress for me in trying to do a good job and working with people I do not know, and therefore don’t know their pattern of behavior. When I am overwhelmed I will lash out in frustration.  Once the operation has settled down and I am performing a routine task that is suited to me than I am at peace.   

Part of my goal in freedom and peace of mind is to have structure where I can manage my anxiety and rigid thinking as I interact with people.  All my adult life I felt if I could be the expert and not have to rely on people skills. I would have been more peaceful in my work environment if I could have done that.  When I would tell people it was very often discounted so when I worked in services where I had to interact with people, I thought they must be right. 

In the past when I was cornered I would quit or leave a relationship or environment.  Being sent away from home taught me that. In order to create peace and reduce my anxiety I have had help in learning coping skills to calm my mind. One of the mantras I use is,  “I can not control it”.   That pulls me out and gives my mind a break. 

The Importance of a Support Team and Why

Posted on by Gregory Wood

Everyone in the world needs a support system to to share the joy during good times and in tougher times to help with challenges. How people use their support system can make a difference of a wise choice or a choice that can lead to a harder path. 

The creation of a support team was a result of of getting sick and ending up in the hospital due to septic shock and dehydration. I am grateful for my sister taking charge.  Before I got sick I was dealing with several changes in my life.    

My father passed away in January and the adjustment of his passing away meant the loss of his strength end encouragement and a place to go in Naples, Fl.  I also had to learn to manage my finances from a big picture standpoint for the long term.   

I got married to my now ex-wife the same year after dating for two years.     Within a month of getting married she lost her job at the post office as a letter carrier due to degenerative back disease.  We lived in my small one bedroom apartment while we were waiting for her to bring in some income.  I was providing support and paying all her bills. Her adult children needed help at the same time. I felt overwhelmed and then pressured into purchasing a house or larger apartment. I felt scared moving out of my apt because of the outlay of money and it was a place that my father helped me move into. My apartment gave me a feeling of being safe. During this year I felt very much alone with no support system. My wife was trying to be my support system but also creating a division between me and my family. The only way I knew how to deal with all the stress was to sleep or stay in my bed under my weighted blanket where I felt safe. I did not feel like eating or even drinking water. I needed a break from my wife due to the intense pressure, so she took to a trip. During this time it gave my brain a chance to rest. I was so worn down that I got sick and I thought it was just a chest cold. I contacted my wife who raced back because I did not want to call 911. She got me to the hospital just in time or I would have been gone.  I learned that as a person with Aspergers I can not deal with constant stress in a way that most people can. The side effects of Aspergers for me is depression and anxiety. I am very routine-orientated and need slow adjustments to new environments. Moving was a hard adjustment, but not for my ex wife.   

After I came out of the hospital my goal was to regain my health. Part of the recovery effort was creating a support system so that I was not alone. The goals of the support system has been to learn how to set limits with my ex wife personally and financially. I have a therapist who helps with emotional support, my energy healer helps support my body, which includes the proper supplements. I receive support from my financial advisor and my sister in paying my bills and insuring  financial sustainability to care for my needs over my lifetime. I receive physical therapy support in moving my body in order to reduce stress and increase confidence. The President has advisors and a support team and I have something similar. Me, like others on the spectrum are good people, kind people, but need an extra hand in the crazy world we live in.