Two years into my marriage my wife was living in Idaho due to a calling from God. I was continuing with with the stress and anxiety issues around my marriage. I went into treatment to have a break from the stress that I was receiving from my wife. She was pressuring me to buy a house and continually nagged me about not having a job. The treatment was therapy with animals at The Ranch. I found working with animals far more rewarding and productive than I did with years of talk therapy. My favorite horse was one named Salt. We worked on boundaries. I learned how to ride a horse. I learned how to trust another person on a horse. I learned about push and pull in relationships with a mule named Albert. I lived in the Spring House, which was an all male home. I enjoyed the community and having meals together. It was nice to wake up in the morning and view the ranch next door. I never knew cattle would start talking when their food was not on time. We were exposed to adventure day, meditation,12 step meetings in town, and spiritual practice. And good country views. It was one of the best investments I made in my life. I would love to go back today for a refresher because it is very easy to fall back into old patterns. I was told I am a co-dependent in treatment. I learned about borderline personality disorder. Asbergers males do have the tendency to be in abusive relationships like I was. What attracted my ex wife to me was my natural nature of being kind. Since treatment I have had to struggle with my kind nature and prevent myself from being taken advantage of by people. It is hard to just be me some days.
Category: Coping with Aspergers
Career Choices
As I child and teenager I never really explored my interests to see if they could have developed into a way to support myself. Being in a boarding school I helped out in the kitchen and helped clean the school on the weekend when other kids went home. I wanted to become a priest or a police officer as a kid.
As a teenager I just did the typical retail and fast food jobs. Over the years my mother felt I should learn a trade, become a forest ranger or attend the merchant marine academy to work on a ship. A professional did some testing on me that suggested learning a trade, otherwise I would be subject to a lifetime of low wage jobs. At the time I wanted to attend college and was a bit hardheaded. Yet I felt I may not be smart enough for the merchant marine academy or go to college to be a forest ranger due to the science courses needed. Some of my testing after being in the workforce showed the following areas would be good matches: outdoors technology, science skilled, protective service, medical billing and coding. I value orderliness, clear directions, and efficiency in my work settings. My profile indicated that I enjoy structure as well as repetition of tasks to work at optimum performance levels and master assignments. I also value settings which includes social interaction. I read a book called Employment for Individuals with NVLD. Some of the careers the book suggested were library science, bank teller, college professor, medical information tech, and vet tech.
Knowing what I know now I would have made an application to the merchant marine academy to see what that would have brought. Living on a Semester at Sea ship for almost 4 months showed me how well I did on the ocean. Or, I would have done the Junior College route and learned a trade or received technical training. I always wanted to be an expert at something.