“you can do it if you try”

from OldLady With Autism

Well, no, not always.. in fact not often. I have neurological struggles which keep me from understanding expectations and from recognizing situations or intentions that are completely obvious to others. I frequently do not understand “what they want” under many circumstances.
“Your’e just not trying”. “You just don’t pay attention”, “You just don’t care”
I have heard versions of this all of my life. I suppose it is meant to be encouraging or to stir me on to even greater achievements or make me feel guilty because I have not accomplished something others believe I “should” “can” or want to do.
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When the World Shut Down, They Saw It Open

By 

It didn’t take a brain surgeon to be able to forecast that when COVID hit us, that there were many people with disabilities who would relish the remote (i.e. accessible) new life.
This April, Maria Sotnikova attended her first Seder: a virtual dinner held over the videoconferencing app Webex. Though she has many Jewish friends, she had never been asked to share in the Passover ritual before.
Ms. Sotnikova, a 33-year-old data scientist in Atlanta, uses a power wheelchair. For years, people have admitted to excluding her from parties, picnics and other gatherings that they assumed, often incorrectly and always patronizingly, she wouldn’t be able to attend.
“I felt like I was getting to see something I should have been invited to all along, but wasn’t, because so few people’s homes are wheelchair accessible,” she said.
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